Questionnaire: Are You Counsellor Material?

Originally written by Anna Martin, updated by the editorial team on 25th May 2026

What Makes a Good Counsellor?

Counselling covers a broad range of specialisms. Some counsellors work with couples and families, others focus on addiction, trauma, bereavement, or stress and anxiety. Despite these different areas, certain personal qualities tend to run through the profession.

A good counsellor can offer genuine empathy and support without judgement. They create a space where clients feel heard and understood. This can seem straightforward, yet it demands significant personal engagement from the counsellor.

Counselling Approach Finder

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More Than Just Listening

People sometimes assume counselling is mostly about listening while someone talks through their problems. Listening is certainly part of it, but there is more involved.

A counsellor needs to pick up on what a client is really saying, sometimes reading between the lines. They must help translate worries and feelings into something the client can work with, often by identifying practical goals or new ways of thinking.

This requires a combination of skills: empathy, patience, the ability to challenge someone gently when needed, and enough flexibility to adapt your approach to different people. Some clients need encouragement. Others need space to sit with difficult emotions. Determining the appropriate response in each unique situation requires both intuition and experience.

Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.

Honest Self Reflection

Before starting counsellor training, it is worth taking time to think honestly about whether the work suits you. Not everyone is cut out for it, and that is perfectly fine.

Ask yourself the following questions:

Do you find it easy to listen without jumping in with advice or solutions?
Can you sit with someone else's distress without feeling overwhelmed or trying to fix things immediately?
Are you comfortable with silence during a conversation?
Do you tend to withhold judgement, even when someone's choices differ from your own?
Can you keep your own emotions in check while still being warm and present?
Are you open to examining your own assumptions and biases?
Do you cope reasonably well with emotional pressure over time?

There are no right or wrong answers here. The objective is to gain insight into your current aptitude and areas for growth. Consider discussing these questions with a mentor or colleague to gain additional perspective. Some of these qualities can be developed through training and supervised practice. Others may come more naturally to you already.

Training, Ethics and Support

If you decide to pursue counselling as a career, formal training will help you build the skills you need. Courses vary in length and approach, from introductory certificates to diploma level qualifications. Several professional bodies set standards and accredit training programmes in the UK, including the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), the UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP), and the National Counselling Society (NCS).

Training typically includes supervised placements where you work with real clients under guidance. This hands on experience is where many trainees discover whether the work feels right for them. You will also need to understand the ethical frameworks that govern counselling practice, covering areas such as confidentiality, boundaries, and professional conduct.

Ongoing supervision is required throughout a counsellor's career, providing accountability and space to process the emotional demands of the job. Many training courses also strongly recommend personal therapy. Practising under a recognised professional body and meeting continuing professional development requirements are standard expectations in the field.

Self care is equally important. Counsellors need strategies to manage their own mental health given the weight of what they hear in sessions.

If you are considering this path, take your time. Speak to practising counsellors if you can. Look into different training routes and think carefully about whether you have the emotional resources to sustain this kind of work over the long term.

The Next Step

Now that you have read through the advice above, you might want to put it into practice. Our Counselling Approach Finder lets you describe what a client brings to you and find out which counselling approach is most evidence based for their situation. Try it now →

51 questions

Ask The Counsellors Guide a Question

TheCounsellorsGuide Editor 17/05/2026 at 1:33 pm

@amyy I'm so sorry for the loss of your son, and it takes real strength to want to turn that into something helpful for others. For online study, have a look at CPCAB accredited courses or the Open University's introductory counselling modules, which can be done from home and stack towards a recognised qualification. You'll usually need to start with a Level 2 certificate before moving up to Level 3 and eventually a Level 4 diploma, which is what most employers want. Lived experience is valuable, but the training also teaches you how to use it safely without it overwhelming the client work.

amyy 29/12/2023 at 8:55 pm

hello, I had son. who was diagnosed with mental conditions since age 13. I was a caretaker for him over his lifespan, Now that he is no more and he has left me with a traumatic but a wealth of experiences that now I feel I can help others to cope and managing their difficult situations. I am not trained in field of counsellor.I wish for you to help me to training to become one with online studying and apply some of my experience in knowledgable ways to help others in need.

Smiler 04/12/2023 at 9:55 pm

I feel and been told many times that I should look into doing counselling on a voluntary basis. I consider to have the many skills required and have the listening empathetic approach to people. I have no idea of the first step to take I,e a class at a nearby college or beit an online course. Can you please advise.

Emerald 03/10/2022 at 7:00 pm

Hi
I want to know what qualifications need to become counsellor?
I’m good at listening to others and their hardships, always good with online people. I learned many different things from online people eg marriage, divorce etc.

None 05/03/2021 at 4:25 pm

Hi, I am 57 and I am 2/3 the way through my level two in counselling skills, I’m looking forward to level three and hopefully going onto level four, sometimes I think to myself, I’m the oldest in the class, I wonder what other people are thinking about me !
They’re probably actually not thinking anything at all about me, and if they are, well they are :-) and if they’re not, then I think they will be successful as I hope I am..

Alicat 17/12/2020 at 3:50 pm

I have been a listening ear to a couple of people for a few months now. Every time we've had conversations via messaged, I've always reiterated that I'm not a qualified counsellor. In addition to listening I've researched various organisations which maybe able to help. How do I know if I'm doing the right thing? How can I get a grounding for basic counselling skill.

lynney 16/07/2020 at 5:43 pm

Hi, I'm 49 years of age, and have recently withdrawn from my nurse training due to the stress on the wards and my father taking ill. I tried training in 2011 but my partner died suddenly when I was about to qualify. I've been very unlucky with my training and it's made me exceedingly anxious about the nurse training specifically.
I'm currently off work as I feel too anxious to go back onto the wards - however, my longing is to retrain as a counsellor and has been for a while. I'm thinking of taking some time out to reconsider my options and am currently doing quite a lot of research. Would it be worth my while and would I stand a chance of getting on a course in my local area? As well as bereavement, I've witnessed domestic violence as a child and also my Dad has a chronic mental health condition - I'm his main carer.
I have suffered anxiety for most of my life due to my traumatic childhood and wonder if I can use my life experience to help others.

Trez 30/06/2020 at 12:15 am

At 47 I think I have found what I want to do and I think I’d be good at at. At present I’m seriously considering applying for a LEVEL 2 CERTIFICATE IN COUNSELLING SKILLS (CSK-L2)
CPCAB ACCREDITED. Would this be a good place to start? TIA

diligenthands 12/06/2020 at 5:46 pm

I have been through so many experiences in life, marriage and career. Will like to have a training as a counselor to impact the younger generation of women.

Louise 06/12/2019 at 10:58 am

Hi I haven’t got any training in counselling, but I have lived a thousand lives. I have been through so many experiences and always managed to pull through the other side.
I am great at braking things down and learning to understand people and reasonings behind their actions. I am a very sensitive person and I can empathise with almost anyone. Their isn’t much I haven’t already been through so when people open up to me, I am able to feel their pain and understand them probably more than anyone with a degree. I am great at solving problems and I do this from sharing my life experiences too and how I managed to deal with all the stress and worries of the world. I am also an open book and don’t believe that only my way works. I feel quite spiritual in some ways and sensitive to feelings.
I’m not academically clear and I don’t learn that way. I learn from things that have happened and also from being hands on or being shown something.

I would love to help others, I already do with people online. But I would love to be a counsellor as a career too. What would be my best options to becoming a counsellor please? Would I have to study for years? I really struggle with reading and writing.

Thank you
Any help would be much appreciated x

Knotty 30/10/2019 at 7:36 pm

I’m an occupational health advisor (RGN) and am considering undertaking a counselling course that would be beneficial for my development but more importantly the clients I see. Can anyone recommend a good course either distance learning or face to face (would need to be local).

greenpink 07/09/2019 at 6:25 pm

Hello I am really keen to train as a counsellor. I am 51 with plenty of life experiences. I am qualified to A level. I am set to attend an introduction to counselling course next month. Please could you recommend the best approach training wise after that? Thanks very much

chilexy 22/05/2019 at 12:48 am

Good evening... I notice I have good talks when it comes to relationships matter...anytime I'm asked to give advice know relationship issue, I found myself talking like its my field....i don't just know where these words will come from... after the talking, the person will be like wow..
I don't know if I'm good to go

Chimera 15/08/2018 at 9:46 pm

I really want to put something back in society I really love to help young people who are having home problems or otherwise. I have been a carer in a home with 10 persons all of different ages but alas had to leave after a hip operation as some persons were violent . I have been out of work for two years and now I am ready for a new challenge

Linds63 Editor 17/07/2018 at 10:38 am

@Eileen - good on you. An inspiration to us all. I was thinking I might be too old at 54, but I'm glad to see I'm not.

Eileen 16/07/2018 at 10:38 am

Never ever think you are too old to retrain. I have just finished advanced counselling with BSY. While on this course I volunteered with a local charity who help children and young adults and their families with mental health issues. In November I am going to start bereavement counselling with them. I am a retired school teacher and I am 66 years of age. Not 66 years old you notice.

Bal 25/02/2018 at 9:13 pm

Good evening.

Here I have a question to ask please?

Is it still possible to study counselling (presently on advanced with BSY)
Whilst I’m in counselling myself for personnal reasons?

I have all the qualities required with a great understanding to many areas of this subject.
Personally I would like to give something back to society with the knowledge and wisdom I have gained over the years.
I am 50 and the reason I have put my age is simply having read some posts here, with age concerns.
Very inspirational and I also say, it’s never too late.

Thank you and look forward to feedback x

OPO Editor 23/10/2017 at 3:57 pm

@Eli - you're at the perfect age to go to university and do a degree in the subjects you wish to specialise in.

Eli 21/10/2017 at 7:05 pm

Hello,
I am a 19 year old male and have always wanted to persue a career in counciling, I have a passion for phycology and wish to use that passion to help others. My only concern is my age. How old would you say is old enough to be able to start a career in this field? I would like to specialize in mental illness.
Thank you

Niki Editor 18/07/2017 at 9:55 am

@Zo - absolutely, your life and nursing experience will play to your strengths. As Matty B says, the fact is there are going to be so many people who need to work as we get older because retirement is being constantly pushed back. There shouldn't be any age discrimination (but we know there is), you just have to get out there and prove there isn't.

Zo 16/07/2017 at 5:36 pm

I am 62 and a semi retired Registered Nurse. Always wanted to do counselling, but will be 65 by the time have completed all the levels. Will I stand any chance of employment by the time I have friends finished?!

Therapist57 28/05/2017 at 11:28 am

Hi, I have just finished my second year of a four year Integrative Psychotherapy course and I'm about to start in my first clinical practice as a volunteer, this is to gain my client contact hours.

After reading your really informative site I am left a little worried as to how I will manage to work with clients orfering brief counselling intervention.
I have been informed by my work placement that I can only offer each client 6 -8 week sessions.

As training to become a psychotherapist I work in Transactional Analysis which is long term therapy. can you recommend or suggest how this might fit into short term Therapuetic counselling which you state is short term and mostly goal, behavioural interventions.

emmanie 22/05/2017 at 6:15 pm

I am a student studing this area of interest

MattYB Editor 09/06/2016 at 11:22 am

@Clare - You are never too old to retrain and many counsellors are older as they have the wisdom of experience to add to the mix. However, despite the policies of no age discrimination, finding a job when you're older is more difficult in general in a market that sees new graduates as the future. Hopefully counselling is one area where age is not seen as a barrier.

Clare 08/06/2016 at 2:31 pm

Hi I wish to change my career to become a counsellor but I am 41. I know there is a lot of training involved in this and will be about 44/45 by the time I finish my courses. Am I too old to retrain will I find it harder being older to get a job when qualified. Thanks Clare

Jo Editor 17/02/2016 at 11:35 am

@Annie - there can be a crossover, for instance you could work in media and also do voluntary work helping others i.e for the charity MIND, or once your media training has completed, this might help you gain work for a charity doing media-based work. It depends really what you feel is uppermost closest to you, i.e writing and/or helping others. However, whatever you decide you can always have a crossover, and that's a nice choice to have.

Annie 16/02/2016 at 6:46 pm

Hi, I'm 16 and I've always loved to help people (at the moment it's been my friends and family), I once got in with the wrong people which led to me having panic attacks and anxiety. I'm over coming it and having a blog has been a big part of my mental recovery. I don't know which route I want to go into. I wanted to go into media and reach people that way so in a September im doing English, ICT and media studies but I want to help people and I also want to work in media. I don't know what I should do. Does anyone have advice? Thank you.

Poppy 14/01/2016 at 2:46 pm

I am a 25 year old woman in Zimbabwe.I have experienced emotional and physical abuses and I have no one to talk to,I just keep everything to myself.This has made me wish to help others who are in the same situation as me.I am currently helping and have helped so many people with relationship problems,who lost loved ones and they are doing just fine.That made me realise I could help so many people out there with similar problems.I want to be a counsellor here in Zimbabwe or in south Africa.

Yvonne Baseley 10/01/2016 at 12:01 am

Has anyone studied the specialist counceling course, did they find it hard to understand,
what was there main concern.

Yvonne Baseley 09/01/2016 at 11:58 pm

Has anyone studied the specialst councelling course with bsy, how did like it and did they find it very hard to understand.

Bon 09/01/2016 at 11:55 pm

Hello, I would love to do the specialist councelling course with bsy and wondered if anyone else has studied this course and what they thought of it.

TheCounsellorsGuide Editor 05/01/2016 at 12:13 pm

You can find all the necessary further information you need to know via whichI hope this helps.

Ava 04/01/2016 at 9:16 pm

Hi, I am 33 years old, post grad in management. I would like to study counselling in the uk. I want to get a qualification which will allow me to work as a counsellor. How should I go about this? Also are there any good universities or institutes in North west England where I could study part time? Thank you

TheCounsellorsGuide Editor 01/10/2015 at 11:13 am

I'm afraid we can't recommend any courses specifically. I have included a link to our partner article, The Cost of Training to be a Counsellor, here. I hope this helps.

Fishlegs 30/09/2015 at 11:00 am

Hello, I qualified as a medical doctor in the UK in 1996. I worked an a trainee general practioner for a while and then had my first child. From then on I decided to take Career break and be a stay-at-home mum. My kids are now 15 13 and 8 and getting back into general practice is too hard. I have been a parenting consultant for an on line mums group for many years and have been running parenting workshops for the last 5 years. But now I feel I need a career change and after having volunteered as a receptionist is a Christian counseling center wonder if I should become a counsellor. I would have to do an online course. Can you recommend any? I am on a tight budget so I cannot afford to spend a lot. Any advice you give will be much appreciated.

Tom 19/07/2015 at 11:05 pm

I'm about to turn 21, and am considering whether I have the right personality and mindset to be a good counselor one day. I've read the comments and responses from other people here; however I would like to be a counselor/psychotherapist based on my personal experiences. I was abused as a child and learned to work through my pain, love and anger through several years of counseling after becoming clinically depressed.

Anybody who has been in a similar situation to me knows that you can't "just move on"; rather it's a journey of catharsis and self-awareness as you explore who you are as a person. I'm an introvert - INTJ if you follow Myers-Briggs - and have a few very close friends who I try to be an impartial source of advice that will listen well and remain confidential. I've learned to become skilled in gaining a person's confidence, and sincerely want to help people in an objective and non-judgmental. I enjoy the sense of being able to help people because of my own experiences; it validates me as a person and I find joy in helping others - no matter their situation.

I feel personally that I am too young to train as a counselor right now; but it's something that I would like to explore in the next few years. I'm in a place in life currently where I want to travel and explore the world - by working with charities to help others whilst gaining a greater perspective who I am.

When I'm ready to return, I'd like to look seriously at training as a counselor. I'm financially conservative and am prepared to devote the time to serious study. Admin, do you feel - or have experience of - younger people can be successful counselors? And if so, what would your advice be to such a person? I'd be interested to hear your perspective.

Thank you,

Tom (20, Southampton, UK)

mpg87 19/05/2015 at 8:39 pm

I'm a 27 male an never really known what to do with my life workwise. I have gone from one dead end job to another and need a change not just for financial gain but i want to help others to. I'm good at listening to people whilst staying emotionally in control. Therefore i have enrolled on a basic counselling skills course which last 10 weeks. If i enjoy the course i aim to complete the 3 year diploma course.

TheCounsellorsGuide Editor 05/03/2015 at 2:19 pm

@Tinkerbell - my advice is to do exactly what you want. Is there anything you have always wanted to do but have never had the chance or time, or any area of your work that you have wanted to pursue? You could go in at a voluntary level and see whether you enjoy it as much as you thought. However, if you want to retain a certain amount of professionalism, have you thought about sitting on committees or boards also? You could combine the both. I'm sure with your skills you will be snapped up at a voluntary level and it may lead to many new enjoyable experiences. However, if you do decide to take the counselling route, you will need some experience. Something like the Samaritans may help as a start, as they do train you up. Whatever you decide - good luck.

Tinkerbell 04/03/2015 at 2:35 pm

I am 55 years old and all my working life have worked in people related jobs where I have worked my way up to management level. I like most in my age bracket have a good deal of experience in mixing with people of all ages and status. I have raised two children have been through an horrendous divorce and I re-married. We have 5 children between us and 4 grandchildren. I am looking to retire in the next few years from the NHS and would like to plan a more flexible and useful role in life. Councelling has always appealed to me but I have had other priorties to consider. What is your advice on this

zush 06/12/2014 at 11:11 am

Hi. I am currently enrolled in doing family nad relatonship counsellin course. As I am so passionalte in helpind and listern to other people's problem. Where can I register to become a professional counsellor? Please help. Thank you

Ros 02/05/2014 at 7:22 pm

I started a Counselling & Psychotherapy home study course through UK Distance Learning a month ago. I have wanted to train as a counsellor for years and decided to do it now. I'm thoroughly enjoying it and have almost completed my first assignment. Looking forward to completing the course and becoming qualified.

Melsie 09/12/2013 at 12:42 pm

I have taken home study courses in counselling through BSY and I have now gained a diploma in advanced counselling skills, I'm just not sure where to go yet as everyone is saying you need to be a Bacp registered counsellor.

claire40 06/12/2013 at 9:13 pm

I have taken home study courses in counselling through BSY and I have now
gained a diploma in advanced counselling skills, I'm just not sure where to go yet as everyone is saying you need to be a Bacp registered counsellor.

glamo 27/10/2013 at 10:26 am

Ifeel I have the qualities of a counselor and am working towards becoming one

AJJ 17/06/2013 at 6:36 pm

Hi, I'm interested in pursuing a career in counselling and would like to know what qualifications I need to achieve this goal. Thank you in advance.

Alina 16/06/2013 at 4:04 pm

Hi, i am a Y10 student and want to be a counsellor in the future, what courses or what qualifications do i need to become a counsellor?

Bunty 12/04/2013 at 3:51 pm

Hi, I recently qualified as a counsellor, but feel, lack of confidence in my ability hinders my personal growth and development. This constant feeling of thinking I am not good enough, constantly challenges most things I do or say. Having said this, I am not afraid to meet these challenges of negative thoughts and feelings, and however hard, I try to face this negativity face on, as I want to be an effective counsellor. Becoming self-aware, an important quality to possess, has helped me to explore why I lack confidence and self-believe, even discussed it in personal therapy, but however, it seems to no avail, sadly. I would love to feel confident in my ability to guide others, but how can I guide others to grow, develop and to have the confidence in the belief that they can achieve anything, as long as they believe in themselves, when I feel my own growth and development, has become stunted.

bukky 27/11/2012 at 4:39 pm

l did my undergraduate study overseas and trained as a Guidance Counsellor. l love and enjoy listening, helping, encouraging, empathic to people's problems but on getting to this country l have not been able to work as a Counsellor. lt is passion for me and l havenot found fulfilment not working as a Counsellor. How can l get accredited to be able to work as a Counsellor? At the moment l work as a Learning Support Assistant but not fulfilled as l wanted to. What do l do to move forward l do not have the funds to study and l desire to boost my knowledge and experience.

jelly baby 17/09/2012 at 8:40 pm

I too have found this site invaluable. I feel drawn to people who need someone just to listen to them, without judgement. I feel this has always been in my nature. I have just finished level 2 counselling, then due to start level 3 this week. I would feel very privaleged to be in a position to help other people who may be struggling, and it is that thought that drives me to pursue my hopes for a fulfiling career.

del 08/07/2012 at 3:45 am

should a counselor use a clients first name or how should they address a client ?
also how should the client address the counselor, first or surname ?
this seems a confusing area , as different tutor's gave opposing answers to me ?

Keyman 04/06/2012 at 11:46 pm

In a world where human interaction is becoming ever more fragmented due to
the external forces of materialism, virtuality and globalisation .New pressures are placed on people resulting in a new evolution of psychological problems.
The rip tide of internet, media and advertising sweeps us, gasping for air, onto beaches of life we are unfamiliar with. In short, humanity, is being forced into being what it is not designed for and cannot cope with.
My own personal experiences, I believe, will give me the basics to become a good counsellor in the modern world because I can provide empathy, sympathy and wisdom to those in need. Therefore I have found this site invaluable and will investigate relevant courses further. My problem is that I am currently unemployed and therefore cannot provide funds.

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